I’ll admit up front, this is one of those occasions when I feel deeply the poverty of words. I can’t begin to understand the experience; being at safe arms-length from the tragedy, I am uncertain and searching for what I should be thinking and feeling.
I have a sense that it’s too easy to offer the standard condolences...”my thoughts and prayers are with the family and friends of those”...that sort of thing doesn’t seem to do the job. It might make me feel better, but it is a fleeting relief at best.
I’ve been thinking a lot about what my reaction should be. As in most things of this significance, I go to trusted sources – often books – that can shine a light on what’s important. It’s not a matter of learning lessons, although that’s important.
For me, it’s the need to find my roots again, to regain my capacity for hope.
Hope is a great antidote for fear.
And in reading, I was reminded once again, that hope and love are linked.
If it is true that love is greater than hope, it’s because we cannot have hope without a degree of love. Love has the power to project hope out into the world and out into the future.
What I felt after the shootings, in addition to fear, was the lack of love and hope.
The fear is lessening now (time will do that), and hope is leading me back to solid ground.
Hope and love will be necessary because we have to go on living in a world that is constantly and intensely challenged by fear.
So here we are, just a month after the fact, still seeking to make sense of everything...and it comes down to love and hope. I’ll set aside the fact that hope remains vulnerable to disappointment. I’ll regain the degree of hope that will let me imagine what better times might fall into place again. I’ll think about what I can do bring that about.
It’s a good thing we have our family and friends at this time.
I hope that you can stay close to yours. They’re a source of love and hope.
Pat
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